I’m 56 years old and finished with menopause a long time ago. I had an early menopause, although I didn’t know it at the time!

In my early 40’s, I felt crap. My energy was in my boots and my motivation wasn’t much better, despite pretty good health and decent self-care. I had days when my energy disappeared and I struggled to put one foot in front of the other, never mind function well in the world. I had broken sleep, an irregular menstrual cycle, several miscarriages, night sweats, hot flushes, and desperate brain fog.

But I was told (on more than one occasion) when I went to the GP, that I was simply too young for menopause. My bloods were fine, so it didn’t look like there was anything wrong! I was offered anti-depressants, which might have been appropriate if I was depressed!

I eventually found solutions that made the journey easier by improving symptoms and increasing energy and by helping me cope with the grief and loss that an early menopause (and multiple miscarriages) can bring.

These are the things I wish I’d known then – they just might help you!


Dear 40 Something You,

You’re not imagining your symptoms – they are real. You’re not making this up!

You can still feel exhausted, even if your bloods are normal. It doesn’t make you weird or broken or mean you’ve wasted the doctor’s time with your concerns.

This will pass, I promise.

There are solutions available – keep trying to find the ones that work for you.

Ask for help – at home, at work and from friends. Playing the martyr game ends in frustration, anger, and resentment (and doesn’t ever help).

Stop expecting others to read your mind and use your voice instead.

Stop saying mean things to yourself, it doesn’t make things any better.

You will feel sexy again.

The bubbly, fun and powerful person you remember is still in there – she’s just buried under laundry and To Do lists! She will re-emerge again once she gets some TLC and support.


If you’re in your 40’s

If my story sounds familiar and you’d like help to thrive in midlife, check out my Power through Perimenopause programme here.

My work in women’s health has led me to training and research in perimenopause and menopause, in the hope I can help women to thrive, rather than survive at this time of life.

To learn more about your hormonal journey, follow me on social media here.

Ashleigh Xxx