Ever feel like you’re permanently on-the-go? Always running around to make sure everyone else is okay? Family, friends, elderly parents, work colleagues. Phew! It’s enough to tire a girl out!

So can I ask?


How much time have you dedicated to You recently?

And I don’t mean collapsing on the sofa to fall asleep in front of the tv?

I mean time, attention and energy devoted to you, your health, your dreams and your emotional well-being? Yeah, that stuff!
The stuff that makes the difference between dragging yourself around and brimming with energy, enthusiasm and fun.

How much time or attention or effort have you given to you? Today? In the last few days? In the last week, month or year?
Be truthful with yourself.  STOP for a moment and check.

How much of your everyday life actually includes You?  You see, it’s easy to fall into the trap of being a service provider to all and sundry, especially if you’re a mum. Because you’d do anything for your kids, until that’s all you do.


Any wonder that life feels flat, or a little lacklustre?

Or that you don’t have a sense of purpose anymore? And you wonder where the feisty, fun-loving YOU has gone? She hasn’t disappeared.  She’s just gotten forgotten for a while but is waiting patiently for you to remember her again.

Because You matter, even when you’re too busy to remember.

I updated my website recently (you can check it out here) and it reminded me of the journey I’ve been on to live a life that includes me.

Because some of us were trained early to be ‘good’ girls and to look after others before even thinking about ourselves.  And it works well for everyone else. And can leave a soul feeling flat, frazzled and with a sense that there must be something more.

Here’s the manifesto I created in the process, one that describes my idea of a contented life:


A contented life has:

  • Time for what’s important in every ordinary day
  • Deep connections with the people I’d ‘do time for’
  • A set of rules that rock my world, not wreck my head
  • Hope for the future, for myself and the world at large
  • Clashing colours because who doesn’t love pink and orange together?
  • The ‘knowing’ that people are amazing — that includes you and me
  • An awareness that life is precious and brief and not to be spared or saved till later
  • Things that can be left undone
  • Brave decisions and follow-through even when we are scared
  • The wisdom that someday is always in the future, which isn’t guaranteed
  • Very few moments wasted on head wreck or regret.

Perimenopause and Menopause are a time of change. Make sure that it’s not just your hormones that change but your behaviours, boundaries and Big-Girl dreams too.

Reach out if you’d like help along the way to create a life that includes You!

Ashleigh Xxx