Once upon a time, a long time ago; I was very afraid. Of what, I wasn’t exactly sure; but that didn’t stop me being afraid anyhow. I think I was mostly afraid of getting it wrong, making a mistake and messing up. As far as I was concerned, making a mistake was the worst thing that could happen!
So I chose one way to make sure I didn’t make mistakes;
“Do everything safely, with lots of planning and future predicting. Take NO risks and keep your head down. Stay under the radar and mostly invisible.” Just get on with things quietly and everything will be fine…, boring but fine. It meant ignoring the questions that raged inside about life, people, behaviours, injustice, passion and risk. Those questions resurfaced again and again, especially during my teens; only to be put away as being too risky to even consider.
But there came a point in my life in my early twenties, that I couldn’t quieten the voice that screamed inside; that was tired of being obedient; that wanted MORE! I was tired being scared – I wanted to be brave for a change.
As a newly qualified nurse in the 80’s, I was broke all the time! There was a second hand bookshop in Ranelagh where I lived and I used to spend hours and a lot of my spare cash in there, discovering books and information that nourished my thirst for information. Some were heavy duty philosophy /spiritual manuals and others were from that other, often derided pop psychology section of the bookstore. One such book that helped me enormously and that’s still doing the rounds over twenty five years later was ‘Feel the fear and Do It Anyway’
It was such a simple book but it came at the perfect time and through it’s pages I learned to feel the fear and do it anyway; literally. I changed my job, my attitude, my mind set and my behaviours and as a result changed my life. It was simple to do and not easy because it was terrifying. My father thought I was nuts giving up my safe, pensionable job and I did it anyhow. I was tired playing it safe and it was the best thing I’ve ever done.
It’s easy for us to slip back into safe mode – to settle for things as they are when we know there’s more within. At this time of Spring time renewal, it just might be time to check within and see if it’s time to feel the fear and do it anyhow! Believe me, Brave can be fun! Enjoy!